2 Corinthians 5:7
That photo is Julie from Sober Julie and I am thrilled to have her guest posting here today. When she sent me a draft of the post I teared up reading her story and testimony. I hope it touches each of you just as much as it did me. ~Toni
For many years I walked through my life by sight not by faith, I was aware that God was always there waiting for me but I avoided Him and the life I was being called to lead.
When I was a young girl I had a close relationship with God, I knew I was loved, planned by God and Jesus was my best friend. He was a loving friend who cared for me deeply and I recall almost every night He was the last being I spoke to, feeling safe in his arms.
I was blessed to have a happy home with my Parents and sister growing up. I attended church throughout my childhood, until I was allowed the decision to attend or not and I chose not to. I didn’t feel a community feeling.
During high school I went to Florida with a Christian youth group, my primary purpose was to hit the Beach but instead I found God again in my life. I was RENEWED!! The Holy Spirit filled me with the Joy of knowing Christ again! I couldn’t wait to get home to share with my family and friends.
Once at home life took over again, I didn’t have a church to attend, nobody to attend with and quickly my priorities became success through education, money, status, friends and love.
Years later I had 2 college diplomas and was living a very fast successful life by my standards at the time. But there was an emptiness within me, a feeling something was missing.
Throughout these years there were many moments where God was speaking to me directly. In quiet times, times where I felt guilty, felt a pull in a direction I was resisting. I knew God was calling me but I just couldn’t face what I foresaw the life of a Christian woman to be.
I can’t remember all of the God winks in my life but I remember the shame well and the need to busy my life to ignore it.
God sent my husband to me when I was just finished my 2nd diploma and wasn’t looking for love. But God knew best, we fell in love, this was the first person I was totally honest with in my adult life.
We were married, bought a house, had 2 children and were very happy together.
But deep inside I was still feeling emptiness.
When my first daughter was 5 months old I went with my sister to hear a speaker who challenged me to consider having a relationship with Christ. Suddenly it became clear to me that it wasn’t a huge task to complete but a journey to live. God already knew me, what I had done and really did love and accept me!!
I was filled with His Joy again!!
And again I was weak to the challenges of daily living and my focus went back to my old idols.
I have always been an all or nothing person, living each area of my life separately, wife, mother, daughter, employee, party girl but this all came to a head when my Alcoholism began taking over my life. The emptiness within me was growing; my 2-3 glasses of wine had become 3-5 bottles on a Friday or Saturday night with anger, hostility, bad choices and blackouts.
Last February I woke from one of these drunken nights and felt the shame before opening my eyes. I was tired of living this empty life and had NO idea how to face life without alcohol.
I prayed, I prayed to the God who held me as a little girl, prayed to the Lord I felt in my teens in Florida, reached out to the hand of Jesus I had felt in my 30’s.
I was utterly defeated, humble, stripped of myself and prayed to God to use my life for His will alone.
I felt a calm fill me as silent tears streamed out of my unopened eyes. I felt His presence, strength holding me and the words BLIND FAITH resounded in my head.
From this moment I have been born again, been led to a 12-Step Program, been called to be very open about my alcoholism and my journey with God.
Coming out as a Christian wasn’t easy, it was SCARY. I had been a Soda Pop Christian before, all shaken and filled up then overtime became flat….I didn’t think this was the life I was being called to lead.
My entire perspective has changed, in my rebirth I’ve found purpose. Each day I give my life to God for His will. He knows I need him to be obvious with me and often is. I am accepting His Grace with action. So now I stand here, strong in my faith proclaiming loudly that Jesus Christ is my Saviour and for this I am humbled and grateful.
The following two tabs change content below.
Toni Patton
Owner at A Daily Dose of Toni
Hi! I'm Toni. I am a happily married, christian, momma of 3 living on Florida's sunny Gulf Coast. I am a lifestyle blogger and Seint Arist. I started blogging when my last child was born as a way to share my love of all things travel, cooking, beauty, recipes, and more. Now pull up a chair, grab a glass of sweet tea and let's get to know each other. I truly hope you enjoy getting A Daily Dose of Toni!
Latest posts by Toni Patton (see all)
- When The Baby Goes to College: I’m Not Ready…But, oh, How Ready She Is - August 22, 2023
- What’s Your Heart Attitude? - August 7, 2023
- Easy Weeknight Dinner Idea: Mini Chicken Pot Pie Recipe - August 6, 2023
Great post Julie. Very well written!
May your testimony bring hope and healing to those far and near! Thanks for sharing.
I agree with the other poster, this is a wonderful testimony and may it change so many lives.
Julie you always have amazing posts!
I hope your testimony changes lives for people all around the world.
very well written. as always.
Beautiful and truly touching!
Thank you all so much….God is soooo GOOD
The Lord is amazing and I think we’re so lucky when we really feel his presence.
I’m thinking that you have been brought into my life so that I know it is okay to be open about my faith. Yes, we are active in our church congregation and the activities at church; that we freely talk about. But I don’t talk about my faith and my relationship with God. Your words give me strength.
What a touching testimony Julie. Our God is an awesome God.
When things get really bad, it’s my faith that gets me through it.