An Open Letter From A Volunteer Cheer Coach

Open Letter From Cheer Coach
Dear Parents,

I consider it an honor that you trust me with your child (or children). I love to teach them; I treat them like I treat my child. If I am honest, I am much harder on my child than I am yours. I want each child to excel when they are on my team. I want them to reach the highest of their potential. I want them to be the best cheerleader (football player, soccer player, baseball player, swimmer, or whatever sport it is) they can be. However, I think that it’s so important that you know a few things when you are not on the coaching side of things.

My time is valuable! When kids are not at the high school age and are on rec sports teams, the coaches are volunteer coaches. That means I give my time; I don’t get paid for coaching your child. Because of that, I hope both you and your child will be respectful of my time. That means arriving on time and staying until the end of practice. Please do your best not to have them leave early because that can put your child at a disadvantage. It also means that you have your child at as many practices as possible during the season. I understand we can’t help vacations planned or being so sick they need to miss. But I give my time to help them become the best, and I need them there to do that. Please respect my time and make sure you are on time, stay until the end and make every practice to the best of your ability. Also, please make sure your child knows the importance of not being a distraction! Yes, they are kids, but practice is not playtime, and sometimes they forget that when they are with their friends.

Your time is valuable too! This is why I do my best to make practice times after 5 p.m. because I know so many of us work outside the home. This is always why I am always 15-20 minutes early because i am aware your time is just as valuable as mine, so I don’t want to make you wait for me to arrive. This is why I also try to send out a message in plenty of time if something comes up and I will be late or need to leave early. I don’t like to mess with the schedule because I know it can throw things off for your planning and I don’t want to do that. However, sometimes practices will be earlier or have to go later, things happen, and I may have to call a practice off at last minute. Trust me when I say I cringe at having to mess with practice times or days because I have each of you in mind and I don’t like to inconvenience anyone.

I make the final decisions. I take suggestions, but the ultimate decision is mine in how things are run for our team. How I run things will be based on what I feel is best for the team, I run things how I see fit. If I catered to every parent, then I would have many teams of one because every parent wants something different. I have to do what works for myself and my team. I will never do anything to endanger the children I coach and will always strive to make them better. Isn’t that what you want for your child? Good, then we are on the same page. Please do bring suggestings to me, but please don’t’ be offended or put off if I don’t use them.

Understand the sacrifices we gladly make! Coaches are always the first one at games and usually the last one to leave, same goes for practices. I don’t get home to my family until well after dinner time. Thankfully, they understand because I know it has to be very frustrating having their mom and wife gone so many nights a week and almost all day on Saturdays. Having a mom who has to miss their games because she is coaching your sibling can’t be easy for the other children in my house, but they go with it. Because they know what having a great coach means, after all, they have great coaches for their teams who sacrifice just like I do. So, please understand the sacrifices we make with our families to be apart of yours.

I don’t like being hard on the children, but sometimes I have to be. When it’s time for a competition, I aim for the top spot, which means my team has to focus at practice. While I want the sport to be fun, I also don’t coach to lose. I want to win! And I know we can, but the children have to give their all, and they have to have discipline. That means I can’t be fun all the time, and it means that sometimes they may come home crying because I may have been tough on them. It means you may hear me yell at them during the games or practice; I promise it’s not to be mean. I do it all because I want them to excel, just like teachers push them at school, I push them in the sport they have chosen to take part in. It’s not a requirement to be on a sports team, it’s a choice, so I expect them to show they want to be there. I can’t control what scores the judges give us, and ultimately if we win, but I can push the girls to do their best and that, in the end, is more important than first place. So please know, if I am tough on them, it’s to push them because I know they have amazing ability to show the world.

I expect respect. I give the children and parents on my team respect from day one, and I expect the same. I can’t make every parent happy, it’s not going to happen, so in the end, you will have to see it my way, which is what I do for my children who play other sports. I have to see it the coaches way and trust they know best!  If your daughter isn’t in a stunt or another part of the routine, I do feel bad, but that’s just the way it goes in this sport. It’s not a reflection of the effort he or she gives during practice. I know every girl gives 110% MOST of the time, but we want to feature their strengths. So, if there is an area they don’t have as high of a talent in, they need to understand (and you need to know) THAT’S OKAY! It just means they have a better strength in another area where they can be highlighted. All I ask is that if you have a concern to bring it to me in a respectful way, it does no good for anyone to come with an attitude, don’t you agree?

Favorites…I don’t have them! I may have one or two girls who are my flyers through the whole routine, that’s because we tested and tried every girl that is flyer size in that area. If your daughter isn’t there, it’s because she wasn’t comfortable enough to pull off the stunt safely. And trust me, we want safety, broken bones are not what a coach wants for any of their team members.  I may have one girl who is always up front for jumps or another that is always the power tumbler. That is because they have the best technique for those parts.

Practice at home is so important. For my sport, which is cheer, your child HAS to practice at home. It’s noticeable when she doesn’t. At the games and competitions, she will stick out.  I have your child a few days a week, but it’s not enough time. They have to practice what they learn at home, or the next practice is spent going over what they should have learned and holding the team back. I tell them to ask questions if they don’t understand something, but even if they get it at practice, if they don’t practice on off days it hurts the team. Because we can’t move forward until everyone has that section down. That means you have to push them at home too!

My days and season keep going even when they end for your child. I go home and think about the girls; it doesn’t just end after practice or the game. I get invested in the children I coach, and I hope you understand just how much I love being able to be in their lives. When the season ends for them, it doesn’t for me. I am already preparing for the next season, thinking about what to do better, what music we should use, what stunts we should pull. It’s a year-round thing for me!

I admit, I may not be the best when it comes to the technical aspect of the routine for competition, but I do my best, and I put my heart into it, and that’s what I want from anyone who coaches my child. It may result in simpler routines than the other teams out there, but I give my all, do what I can and give my very best to the girls, and I hope that is good enough for you.

Parents I love your children as if they were my own. In fact, when they are on my time I see them as my kids. I want the best for them and expect the best of them. I love spending time with them and making the memories that I hope will last them a lifetime. Thank you for allowing me to be a part of your child’s life, but please understand that while I enjoy every moment with them, it is stressful, and so I need support and encouragement just like I give your child. As a coach, words of support and encouragement do wonders, so please remember that the next time your child is on my (or any other) team. Take time to encourage your child’s coach. Please don’t tear them down or talk behind their backs (this always gets back to the coach, trust me on this). Please remember it’s not always easy, and coaches who volunteer deserve just as much respect as those who do it for pay!

From A Coach Who Loves Coaching Your Child!


P.S. We love when you take the time to volunteer with us, but if you don’t then just sit back and enjoy the show! However, please hold the complaints (unless a coach is endangering your child, then definitely speak up). I promise you those words of encouragement make a world of difference!


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Hi! I'm Toni. I am a happily married, christian, momma of 3 living on Florida's sunny Gulf Coast. I am a lifestyle blogger and Seint Arist. I started blogging when my last child was born as a way to share my love of all things travel, cooking, beauty, recipes, and more. Now pull up a chair, grab a glass of sweet tea and let's get to know each other. I truly hope you enjoy getting A Daily Dose of Toni!


  1. 1

    You sound like the perfect coach! And it is obvious you give thought and wisdom to all your decisions!

  2. 2

    You sound like the perfect coach! And it is obvious you give thought and wisdom to all your decisions!